What We Believe About Grief

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The Six Needs of Mourning: A Guide to Healing After Loss

At Valerie’s House, we understand that grief is deeply personal and different for everyone. Through our work with grieving families, mental health expertise, and ongoing research, we’ve developed a compassionate approach to help people heal.

We believe:

  • Each person has the capacity to heal.

  • Grief is individual.

  • Grief is personal.

  • There is no timeline for grieving.

  • Grief comes in waves.

  • You don’t just “get over” grief—you learn to live with it.

One of the core frameworks we use is Dr. Alan Wolfelt’s Six Needs of Mourning, a step-by-step guide that encourages mourners to actively work through their grief. Meeting these needs doesn’t follow a strict schedule—it’s a journey that unfolds over time. If you’d like to explore more, click here to read Dr. Wolfelt’s original work.

What Are the Six Needs of Mourning?

The Six Needs of Mourning are not a checklist to “complete” grief but rather a path to finding meaning, healing, and renewed purpose.

1. Acknowledge the Reality of the Death

The healing process begins by gently facing the reality that your loved one is no longer physically present. This can be a gradual realization as you replay memories and talk about the loss. At Valerie’s House, we provide a supportive environment where this acknowledgment can happen in your own time.

2. Embrace the Pain of the Loss

Grieving hurts, and avoiding that pain may seem like the easier option. However, true healing comes when we face it head-on in small, manageable doses. Our support groups and counseling provide the safe spaces you need to process this pain without feeling overwhelmed.

3. Remember the Person Who Died

Keeping memories alive is an essential part of mourning. Whether through photos, stories, or meaningful keepsakes, these connections help us bridge the past with the present. Valerie’s House encourages families to honor their loved ones in meaningful ways, allowing memories to support their healing.

4. Develop a New Self-Identity

The loss of a loved one often changes how we see ourselves. You may no longer be a spouse, parent, or sibling in the same way you once were. This transition can be challenging, but it’s also an opportunity to uncover new strengths and roles. Through personalized grief programs, we help families navigate these changes.

5. Search for Meaning

Loss often leaves us questioning life’s purpose and our beliefs. It’s normal to wonder “why” or struggle with spiritual and existential questions. Valerie’s House offers a space to explore these thoughts openly, without judgment, as part of the healing process.

6. Receive Ongoing Support from Others

Healing from grief isn’t something anyone should do alone. Support from others, whether through family, friends, or peer groups, is essential. At Valerie’s House, we recognize that healing takes time, and we’re here for you long after the initial loss.

Healing Takes Time—and You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

At Valerie’s House, we know grief doesn’t have a set timeline. Some days may feel overwhelming, while others bring moments of peace. Grieving families often describe their experience as waves—sometimes crashing, sometimes calm.

That’s why our support programs are designed to meet you where you are. Whether you join a grief support group, work with one of our grief counselors, or participate in creative activities like grief art, you’ll find the understanding and compassion you need to heal.

We also recognize that no two grief journeys are alike. The Four Tasks of Mourning, developed by Dr. J. William Worden, complement Dr. Wolfelt’s Six Needs of Mourning and serve as another helpful framework.

Interested in learning more about the Six Needs of Mourning? Read Dr. Wolfelt’s full article here.

Valerie’s House Programs That Support the Six Needs of Mourning:

  • Peer Support Groups: Safe spaces where families can share their stories and connect with others.

  • Grief Counseling for Kids and Teens: Individual and group sessions led by grief experts.

  • Youth Grief Programs: Activities designed to help kids and teens express their emotions creatively.

  • Family Events and Community Gatherings: Opportunities for grieving families to come together and heal.

Grief is not about “moving on” but learning to move forward with the love and memories of those we’ve lost. At Valerie’s House, we’re here to walk that journey with you.

Contact us today to learn how our grief support programs can help you or someone you love:

info@valerieshouse.org or 239-204-5804.

Keywords: Grief Support Center, Six Needs of Mourning, Healing from Loss, Navigating Grief, Mourning Process, Grief Counseling, Support for Grieving Families, Child Loss Support, Youth Grief Programs